My Blank Cheque

A while ago there was a day where like nothing happened. So as I was getting ready for work the thing that was kicked to the top of Radio 4's 'Must Discuss' list was the possibility that the Monetary Organisation, might, possibly think about maybe starting to phase out cheques after 2018. Possibly. Maybe.

Fatuous and pointless a discussion as it is, it did inspire some debate. I've written maybe one cheque in my life. I resisted getting a chequebook for ever, I didn't see why I'd ever need it. I now use it for storing Euros. The point being made was that those of an elderly persuasion, the ones who haven't yet mastered the intricacies of Paypal and whose only understanding of the plastic in their wallets is that it most certainly is not a condom, might not be so cool with paying by card or cash. This seems reasonable, it's always my Gran that sends a cheque and my mum that 'transfers' on the web and my Dad that slips me £20 note with the ever-classic and non-sensical 'Don't tell your mother.' As if she'd go on an insane bender at the thought of untraceable cash liberally flowing around our immediate family.

So they had people on pointing out that cheques were expensive and slow and liable to forgery. The point was made that they're unnecessary, impractical and unreliable. All this time the other side just repeatedly muttered the words 'But what about the older folk? The aged? The widowed? People who are too old to know about cards? The elder and immobile? The wisened and frail? Those to whom the internet is a strange and confusing world?' Like the noise your washing machine makes when it's getting itself pumped up for a brisk spin dry again. You know the; 'hmph, hmph, hmph, hmm.' noise.

The argument for phasing them out was strong enough, I didn't really need any more convincing. Really the defenders were scrabbling in the corner, clinging for purchase. But, the aggressors could have made much shorter work of it by using the powerful argument that if the Monetary Organisation decides to start phasing out cheques in 9 years time, the people who really rely on them will be, or very shortly be dead and buried. So it doesn't matter, allow the world to evolve please, thank you very much.

Still, like I said, nothing much was happening at all that day and if they had sped through the whole debate with that one, crushing blow then I would have had to have listened to that dreadful chap who does the Christian poems on 'Thought for The Day.'

No thanks.