Probably the funniest book published this year, a collecion of amatuer writers with small, random lists of things. Here are some great extracts:
Things Not Overheard at a Conceptual Art Gallery Opening:
"White wine, red wine. Who do I have to fuck to get a capri sun around here?"
"Now that you mention it, I have no idea who designed this shirt."
"Well that's obvious, but what do the other three midgets represent?"
"Let me get this straight - the artist is gay and german? You just blew my mind."
"I can't, I have to work tomorrow."
Lesser-Known Movie Prequels:
Borederline-Inappropriate Dancing
Four Bachelorette Parties and a Friend in Hospital
Joseph and the Nondescript Monochrome Sportcoat
There are Plenty of Mohicans
Reasons To Be Friends With George W. Bush:
Sleepovers at the White House.
Late night snacks prepared by White House chef during sleepovers at the White House.
Making elaborate fort out of pillows and blankets in Loncoln Bedroom, then attacking it/defending it with G.I. Joe and Cobra action figures during sleepover at the White House
Would give me an affectionate nickname - "J-Man" or "Skippy".
Possibly of lifetime appointment to one of the most important jobs in the country despite no discrenible qualifications for that job.
Signs That Your Unicorn Is Cheating On You:
Seems emotionally distant and uninterested.
Wears fancier tail ribbons.
Starts working out at the gym.
Quickly closes it's laptop when you walk into it's enchanted den.
Credit card bill full of charges to are elf lodges.
The "Three C's"; Confrontation, criticism, complaints.
Every time you say the word "magic", it sighs forlornly.
Is making a movie with Angelina Jolie.
Get it. There's a lot of unicorn references. Fantastic stuff.
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